What I Wish I Knew Before Going to the Hospital


  1. Your Birth Plan Will Totally Change

Okay, maybe some of you will have this easy delivery and all your wishes on your birth plan will come true. However, from my own experience, and what I’ve heard from almost all other women, doulas, doctors and nurses; your birth plan goes out the window no matter how hard you to try to plan it.
I had a very detailed one page birth plan that basically said I wanted the most natural birth possible with the least interventions. I didn’t want an epidural, no pitocin, I didn’t want to use forceps or suction, I only wanted intermittent fetal monitoring and I definitely didn’t want a C-Section.

Well, as I was induced at 42+ weeks, I ended up having to get pitocin, fetal monitoring and eventually, an epidural. After 2 days of labor and 36 hours of pushing, I don’t regret it! In the end, I got a healthy baby out of it and I’m glad I knew the options, even if I wasn’t able to have my ideal birth. 

  1. Some Nurses will Suck

I had a few that just plain sucked. They were probably very knowledgeable and experienced, but I just didn’t like their bedside manner. They’ve seen ALL this before and some aren’t as sympathetic as they should be, at least for terrified first timers like myself.

You know what? You can request another nurse!

I didn’t like one nurse because she kept telling me all the worst case scenarios, unsolicited, and she also was very rough while putting in my IV. I didn’t send her away at first but when we had her AGAIN on her next shift, I told my husband that we needed someone else ASAP.


  1. It can take WAY longer than you think

I had heard these lovely birth stories from my mom, mother-in-law and close friends that they went into the hospital and had their baby a few hours later! I  surely did not. I went in on a Saturday and didn’t hold my baby until 1am on Tuesday. I also didn’t leave the hospital until Thursday. Not exactly the week away I’d hoped for but still, we got a healthy baby out of it!


  1. EVERYONE will see (all of) you Naked

There was no curtain. My room basically had a revolving door of nurses and doctors, and nothing was… um… hidden. This was not what I had pictured. I thought it’d be more discrete and only my nurse and my doctor would be permitted. Nope. I think the entire hospital must have seen my private bits. It was embarrassing at first but as things progressed, I stopped caring!

  1. Epidurals can help you avoid C-Sections

I really didn’t want a C-Section because I had heard rough stories about the recovery from close friends. I also knew that my husband had to go back to work soon and if I couldn’t take care of myself and the baby, we’d be in trouble.

I also didn’t like the idea of an epidural. I HATE needles. I also had broken my lower back when I was a teen. I also didn’t want any drugs getting into my baby. Well, after 24 hours of contractions and excruciating pain, I had to get one if I were to have enough strength to deliver the baby without help.

I requested an epidural at 11pm and was asleep by midnight.

Yes, it was super painful during the administration (and I couldn’t even look at that needle) but as a result, I was able to then sleep for 6 hours.

After two days of not sleeping a wink, this allowed me the energy to handle the following 24 hours.


  1. Epidurals Don’t Numb Anything when Pushing

What!? Seriously? Contractions are terrible and they do help there, but the REAL pain comes from pushing. And guess what, epidurals don’t do anything for that. Maybe it is good I didn’t know that. Sorry for spoiling it!


  1. Room ambiance doesn’t matter much

I wanted to create this super calm, positive space with inspiring music, soothing scents and chill vibes. And we did! My doula and husband helped to make my room so zen and cool. I really appreciated it in the hours leading up to labor, and since we had an induction, we had many of those. But guess what, on hour 12 of pushing did I even hear what music was playing or could I even think about scents? Nope. Didn’t matter.


  1. You Can’t Eat!

I had heard this that’s true. And I brought in an epic snack bag with healthy granola bars, gummi bears, pureed fruits, smoothies etc. However, once I got that IV, they didn’t want me to eat. And not eating for a few days made me very ‘hangry’ and very weak. I had my husband and doula sneak me some crackers and gummi bears but next time, I am not listening to the staff and I’m going to eat. I think it would have been a lot better if I did!

  1. Your Body will do Crazy Things

When those contractions start to get intense, you will lose all connection to anything else. I know all I could do was focus on getting through each contraction. I could barely speak, think or even process anything else around me. I had to just focus on the task at hand.

I also started shaking uncontrollably. This lasted for hours.

It was unfortunate as it was tiring in between contractions but it could not be helped. I think it terrified my husband.


  1. Meeting your Baby makes it all Better

After the hell that I went through for 3 days, I honestly started to think that I wasn’t ever going to get my baby out. We faced a lot of challenges, from a fever, shaking, and to her getting a bit stuck.

But when she did enter into this world and was handed to me, it all faded into the background.

The room was chaotic, the doctor was stitching me up, the nurses were yelling things–but it all disappeared. I didn’t even see or hear it. All I saw was her. She was healthy, beautiful and finally here. All the trauma and pain that I had been experiencing was gone and I felt like I had all the energy in the world. I finally had my baby. 



As a mother, probably you are very excited to have a baby shower and received gifts such as these new baby cookies. I have a lot to share but these first 4 weeks with a newborn have kept me quite busy (and away from my computer).

Here is the quick rundown on what happened:

I gave birth to a beautiful, healthy baby girl on June 12th, 2018 at 1:05am.
She was 8lbs 10oz, 20.5 inches in length and completely perfect.

Her name is Aurora Blake Lee, in honor of the goddess of the dawn.

My labor was not perfect–I had to get induced at 42 weeks and this process too 4 days until she arrived by natural delivery. Let me tell you, it was very painful and very long. I don’t know how I endured it, but I give lots of credit to my husband, my amazing doula Karla and the team at UCLA Santa Monica. More on this later!

The past 4 weeks, we’ve been figuring out how to become parents! I’ve gotten to know my little girl, understand how to soothe her, bathe her, breastfeed her, change her and entertain her! It’s not been easy and I’ve slept VERY little, but my husband and I getting a little better at it every day.

Aurora is adorable. She loves to snuggle, is growing very fast for her age (in the 99th percentiles), is very alert, follows us with her eyes, holds her head up and makes me laugh all the time. She is getting better at napping, but so far that has been a challenge (for all of us).

We are also planning our first trip with Aurora at the end of August! Will be writing a lot more about that adventure as it approaches!



Mama Kelley